The Jokes Thread

There was a blonde, a red head, and a brunette and they were all up in space. Each girl tried thinking up ways to be better than the other two.
The red head said, "I am going to be the first woman to land on Mars."
The brunette said, "I can beat that, I'll be the first woman to land on Saturn."
The blonde said, "I'll beat both of you, I'll be the first woman to land on the Sun."
"How are you going to do that?" The other two asked.
"Simple", said the blonde. "I'll go at night!"

Aaaaaand...

A blonde was filling out a job application form. She quickly filled out the columns entitled: Name, Age, Address, etc.
Finally, she came to the column: Salary Expected.
She wrote, "YES."

OMG. thats great, awesome

^^ I LOVE them!

Glad you two enjoyed that, then.

Yo mama's so stupid, if you gave her a penny for her thoughts you'd get change.

Yo mama's so stupid, she wouldn't know up from down if she had three guesses.

Yo mama's so stupid, she ran outside with a purse because she heard there was change in the weather.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a lawsuit was something you wear to court.

Yo mama's so stupid, if she spoke her mind, she'd be speechless.

That's great sissy

Why do blondes wear underwear? To keep their ankles warm.

Why do blondes wear big earrings? To have somewhere to put their feet during sex.

*dies*
Oh. My. God.

That's great
Blonde jokes are the best

Yo mama's so stupid, she went to the Gap to get her teeth fixed.

Yo mama's so stupid, that she tries sending voicemail by yelling into an envelope.

Yo mama's so stupid, when she took you to the airport and a sign said "Airport Left, " she turned around and went home.

Yo mama's so stupid, she thought a quarterback was a refund.

Yo mama's so fat, no one knows whether she's walking or rolling.

Oh. My .God.



So amusing

I know.

Why do blondes like lightning?
They think someone is taking their picture.

What can save a dying blond?
Hair transplants.

Why didn't the blond want a window seat on the plane?
He didn't want it the wind to mess up his hair.

Did you hear about the new epidemic among blondes?
It's called MAIDS - if they don't get one, they die.

*dies laughing*

OMG. Continue, im getting laugh cramps

What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
A mental block.

What is the difference between a blonde and an inflatable doll?
About two cans of hair spray.

How do blonde brain cells die?
Alone.

What do you call a blond with half a brain?
Gifted!

What do UFOs and smart blondes have in common?
You keep hearing about them, but never see any.

OMG. I read this whole thread to Holly on the phone and she was cracking up

I pronounce Surabhi, the queen of yo mama/blonde jokes

Quote :

What do UFOs and smart blondes have in common?
You keep hearing about them, but never see any.

I LOVE THAT ONE!!!

I got one I ggot one!

How do you cancel an appointment at a sperm bank?


You call and say "Sorry, I couldn't come"


HAHAHAHAH!

^

Hehehehehe

lol

You're awful, Raggy.

:d *beams*
I know.

Hey!
Did you hear about the kidnapping?

....
Well he woke up.


*giggles* it took me 10 minutes to get that one.

I've heard that one like five billion times.

Did you hear about the genius cow?

She was outstanding in her field.........

^

Nice Steve

What's gray?

A melted penguin.

:B